Parents and Families Are the First Layer of Defense

Culture Healers cannot ignore the reality that we’re seeing the war that is being waged over the next generation. President Ronald Reagan is noted for saying that “freedom is never more than one generation away from extinction.” Knowing this, how far are we from crippling the next generation when there is such an uproar over the protection of the unborn and their right to life? How close are we to destroying a generation when we will not protect children from making permanent decisions over a temporary circumstance?

I’ve shared thoughts about abdicated authority in previous posts. As parents are the first image of authority in a child’s life, abdicating that authority becomes problematic for the safety and direction of children. Parents are admonished to “train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart (Proverbs 22:6).” Another translation of that verse says, “direct your children on the right path, and when they are older, they will not leave it (NLT).”

In the book of Psalms, we’re told that “children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb is a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, so are the children of one’s youth. Happy is the man whose quiver is full of them; they shall not be ashamed, but shall speak with their enemies at the gate (Psalm 127:3-5). You can plainly see the high value that is placed on parenting. Children are described as an inheritance, as well as depicted as arrows in the arsenal of a warrior. This depiction of arrows is not to say that children are to be used as weapons in a fight but to illustrate the power that is within them to meet the challenges beyond us.

Children can’t tackle the issues and challenges that they are meant to face if parents abdicate their role as governors, guides, guards, and gatherers that help them to grow. There is a five-fold charge that parents must carry out so that children can become who they are meant to become. If parents, therefore, become a stumbling block to that process, they essentially contribute to the further decay and erosion of culture, rather than participate in the best effort to curb that erosion.

There are enough challenges in a young child’s life simply in growing up to be an adult than having to deal with all manner of abuse, corruption, exploitation, and being made the sacrificial pawns in immoral and political machinations.

Part of the way parents and family help to provide that defense for children is in the moral foundation that is established. Faith is one key way in which parents can do this. Faith helps to provide a ground basis for what is right and wrong, a sense of common belief, and a point of focus when everything outside of the family unit becomes overwhelming and senseless. Tradition, consistency, and repetition help reinforce things that you want to become habits and a part of their character makeup. These are aspects of good governing.

Another way parents and families help provide that defense is through the fostering of dreams, creativity, and imagination. This is how you help guide children in the process of discovering the world they live in, and what things become interests to them. My wife plays a major role in our younger daughter's love of all sorts of technology. She can already see herself working in that industry. Our son gets his love of art and building things from both me and my wife. There’s no telling how his creativity will play out in the coming years.

A third way parents and families provide defense for children is by guarding them against external things that could bring potential harm to them physically, psychologically, emotionally, and spiritually. There is an innocence in childhood, that once lost is difficult if not impossible to regain. Guarding the gates of their eyes, ears, hearts, and minds is becoming increasingly challenging for parents in the digital and social media age. What used to be kept behind closed doors of people’s private lives is now being spilled out publicly both in the streets and across mobile devices.

A fourth way that parents and families can provide defense for children is by endearing them to the family and community through acts of service. This is enhanced greatly through like-minded communities that share similar values.

A fifth way that parents and families can provide defense for children is through celebrating and marking pivotal moments and milestones. As children grow, it’s become significant for them to know that they are reaching certain levels of maturity. When looking at the life of Jesus, it was during his twelfth year that he went to the synagogue and it was said of him that he grew in wisdom, stature, and favor with God and man (Luke 2:52). At age thirty, he was baptized by his cousin John, and from heaven, God spoke, “This is my beloved son, in whom I am well pleased (Matthew 3:17).

These moments and rites of passage are increasingly significant and affirming. It’s an assurance that helps children prosper and with all hope, continue on in their own families when the time comes. As I stated earlier, there are enough challenges in a child’s life. It’s up to parents and families to be that first layer of defense in protecting that innocence and ensuring that the boundaries provide the necessary structure for healthy growth.